Power of “No Idea, Sir”

A leading business newspaper is running a campaign called “the power of ideas.” It makes me laugh. Because, from my personal experience, I know the “power of no idea.”


This was almost a decade back, when I was doing graduation in electrical engineering. Those were the most difficult years of my life. I was a very bad student and my concepts were pathetic. Despite sincere efforts from my friends to explain things in the simplest manner possible, I was unable to grasp most of the things.

In the first semester, the problem was not very acute. During vivas, when I couldn’t answer most of their answers, my professors used to advise me to take a change in civil engineering. I told them, “Sir, I will try hard and learn.” They were not very optimistic.

In the second semester, I had my first real encounter with electrical engineering, when I had to study “Electrical Engineering I”. (three more followed after that in subsequent semesters). The only thing, I could learn was Ohm’s law: I = V/R. That too only the mathematical expression. The exact definition was out of my reach. But, my kind-hearted professor gave me 20 marks out of 50, the minimum to clear the viva exam. He told me, “You have at least tried to draw the circuit diagram. I hope you will learn something next year.” I thanked him profusely and promised to do my best.

However, despite my attempts, I could not understand most of the things. In the second year, I had more electrical engineering subjects. (In the first two years of engineering all the streams have lot of common subjects like maths, physics, engineering drawing, applied mechanics etc etc. So, there are only few subjects in the first two years of your own branch.) By that time, I could no longer hide my weaknesses and professors were also not that kind. They expected certain amount of knowledge from a second year student. Sometimes, they will take viva of 2-3 students at a time. I was happy in those vivas, because they used to get only a limited time to insult me during those vivas. Invariably, to any question from my professors, my answer would be “no idea, sir.” After 2-3 questions, they will get frustrated and tell me, “What do you know? Ok, tell us what’s Ohm’s law?” I would promptly say, " I=V/R." They will demand the exact definition, which obviously I didn’t know. But, they kept faith in me and pushed me in the third year. That’s it.

After that, there was no mercy whatsoever. In all the vivas, my answer to most of the questions would be “no idea, sir.” But, somehow, that answer helped and I managed to clear all the vivas and finally became an engineer. Obviously, it was not in 4 years. I struggled for 6 years and 4 months to complete my course. However, since then, I have always known the “power of no idea.”

End of the road

I am deeply worried. Worried about my own future and for millions of others who are as ignorant as I am. The world is changing very fast. It used to be very simple When I was young.

In those days, Internet for me was yahoo chat rooms and e-mail. I still remember those college days, not very far, 7-8 years ago. My friends used to go for Internet surfing. They used to talk endlessly about having a foreigner online friend, female obviously. They used to boast how many friends they have and stuff like that. In my smugness, I used to look down at them. Poor souls! They are wasting their precious time on some fictitious chick, while I am getting enlightened.

Being a curious fellow, after a while I also decided to know what this Internet chatting is all about. I didn't know the rules of the game. I tried my luck with my most common Gujarati name (I can never forgive my parents for that) and whatever English vocabulary I had. The result was horrible. Chat room after chat room, forget girls, even the most hopeless aunties refused to talk with me. On the other hand, some of my friends were chatting with 3 girls at a time. After few weeks, I learned a few tricks. I started getting responses from some girls as I made use of my palmistry and sun sign knowledge. However, I couldn't make much headway as my typing speed was pathetic. Some of the girls used to think that I am busy chatting with another girl, when I was really struggling to find something on the keyboard.

I got fed up. But, being an intelligent fellow (in those days, not now), I decided to turn my weaknesses into my strengths. I asked myself, "What are my weaknesses in the yahoo chat room?" One I am a male and two my typing speed is horrible. Why not create a nice female id for myself and show those silly boys (my friends), what I am capable of. And the trick worked like a magic. As soon as I entered with a female id, all the boys in the chat room used to approach me. Even though, my typing speed was pathetic, those fools used to wait for minutes for a single sentence from me. It was entertainment at its best. Some of them used to tell their sad stories and even proposed to marry me. Most of them wanted my contact number. After few weeks, I lost interest and ended that silly game. Again, I returned to the comfort of reading great books. This time with even more smugness than before. My temporary affair with Internet ended there. I concluded that most of the stuff on the net is silly. It's only for frustrated boys who have never got a chance to speak with female species in real life.

After I joined journalism, I came to know about the power of Google. I was amazed. You don't need to remember anything. You don't need to think. Just type a few key words and Google will give you whatever you want. For people like me, who are blessed with poor memory, it was a gift from heaven. Once, I finished my course, I realized the power of online job sites. I also came to know about many wonderful things, like how I can listen to an old Hindi film song online and also watch a movie for free. My friends also told me how I can read e-books on the net. But, I don't like that idea even though it's cheap. I still prefer the old way of reading books.

Before coming to Phursatgunj, I was happy thinking I have become well aware about the Internet usage. I know stuff like how to book flight tickets online, Internet banking and online trading. Two weeks with Sabu and I am again feeling downtrodden. Everyday, he tells me something new about Internet which my tired mind refuses to understand. Brother, have mercy on this aging friend!!!

Anyway, I am lucky that I have some smart friends who have abundance of time and patience to explain the changing technology around me. But, I know everything has a limit. What will happen if they will all become very busy and lose patience? Sabu is already showing some signs of that. This can't go on forever. I can clearly imagine myself 10 years down the line. A helpless middle-aged guy whom even a 4-years old child will not respect.