September 23, 2006

The Wanderer

after a week of rest i am back with the business. what do i do here? i dont know but i know one thing that whatever it is, it is funny. i have all the time in the world to waste on me and my friends. last few days i am thinking about uploading images friom our sindhrout visit to this blog but i think it is a mammoth task for a man like me. lazyness prevent me from doing anything which involves somekind of movement physical or mental. i dont think when i type here.
anyway how are you my dear old age friends? i have heard..... once upon a time in mumbai there were two teen ager boys with dreams in there eyes and ........... to be cont.
i travel a lot these days. right now i am again in amdavad and why i am here. god knows i dont know, will tell you soon. . . .
today again i traveled on MEMU. one of the miracles of western railway. you rarely find someone with ticket or season pass on board and you dont need to worry about that. bomb blasts and riots dont make any difference here, this places are like temples of hindu-muslim ekta. i will tell you people about this hindu-muslim unity story of MEMU soon. till than good bye.
long live lazyness. long live brotherhood.

September 16, 2006

Nautre Calling

10a.m.
sardarnagar kholi.
good morning.
this is saboo here again after a long and lazy week. in last one week nothing happened except a good visit to the bhavani-nagar near sindhrout yesterday morning. visit was a good experience. we have more than 200 pictures of the sindhrout visit and will post few of them when again i will be here. i, chinti, nikol and gudbud was there at 5 in the morning. that was gudbud's first visit to the sindhrout village. nikol and chinti were also very excited as we were on the way to sindhrout from phursatgunj. our journey began at 5 in the morning with a regular tea and cigi rituals.
we had two mobile phones with camera and we snapped a lot of natural beauty early in the morning. i dont know anything about photography but few of the snaps are really very good and will try to upload them from this pathetic internet connection at sardarnagar. in the morning for three full hours we roamed around the mini-jungles near bhavaninagar. there were beautiful birds, deers and few million earthworms on the roads to the jungle. we have pictures and videos of everything. most beautiful of the natural beauty is sunrise at sindhrout, calm and slow and peaceful. i can not capture the beauty of the sunrise in the cameras powered by few megapixels but i have tried to do so and will post them on the blog. will be back with stories of sindhrout visit. bye now.

visit to mahi river and jungles around

this is my first
blog from a mobile. this is about our visit to bhavani nagar on the banks
of mahi river near sindhrout. i will tell you people full story when
i will log in from comp....
till than goodbye.
--
suniyo.
nonsense -the sense with in.

September 11, 2006

2 days in Amdavad

my visit to amdavad is a yo-yo. i dont go out of my house very often except when somebody calls me and in extreme case when i feel like smoke. if the craveing is not strong enough to move my ass go out and smoke i avoid it. i supress my desires to smoke. my laziness is and good food at my house prevent me to go outside. i eat like anything when i am at home. i store food like polar bears because when i am in baroda there is no guarantee that i will get the dinner or not. ha ha. that is the story of cheap aristocracy.

most of the time i avoid to go outside. i dont even move out of my room very often. i just keep me inside my abode on the top floor of my old house. i love this room. everything is messy here. you can not find a single thing at proper place. but i enjoy the way my room is. most of the time i surf the net and do all kind of nonsense things and meditations in my room and read a lot of books which my father has collected. i dont have any collection of my own except few thousand ebooks which i regularly read. this time i didnt try even to go for a bicycle ride in the morning. that is my favourite time-pass at home and i also get a chance to smoke in the fresh air of the early morning. but now i think i am too old and can not afford such kind of exercises like jogging and cycling. i play chess and that too very badly these days. i dont know what happened but i think my game is now worse than the worst. there is something in my mind which rules my body and my actions. sometimes i play as if i will beat the grandmasters and the next moment a kid like software beats me and i feel as if i dont have any memory left. i dont remeber things now. sometimes i forget to lock my room when i go to kalubhai. there is nothing inside the room which is of the great importance. i will go to kalubhai in the evening. it is 8 30 in the morning and i am in amdavad but very soon with in few hours i will be there in baroda and you can see how fast we can travel now. i dont like traveling very much but if i am on the go i enjoy the local trains and people of india on board. they can discuss anything and everything from neuro-psychology to laluprasad yadav. i dont talk a lot now when i travel but still somehow they drag me into their mindless discussions and i also give my valueable inputs to kill my time while i travel. today again i will travel on the great MEMU and will again find all kind of funny and crazy people on the train. i really appreciate the way lalluyadav handled railway ministry and i see a potential prime minister in him. people will laugh at me if i utter such arrogant statements, but the same public on railways will be amazed when they will see the lallubhai taking oath as the prime minister of india very soon. even in that case i dont have to worry or hurry to catch the trains because i can see vision in laluyadavbhai's eyes.

i am hungry now and have to go downstairs to stuff my tummy with all kind of edible and non-edible food available at my place. i want to move out now as i really feel suffocated in the 12 by 12 room without any doors or windows. but i love my room. will be back soon. bye now.

long live laziness. long live brotherhood.

September 10, 2006

E-books and a Dr.unkard

i have downloaded more then 100 ebooks today and i will download much more tomorrow to finish my collection of e-books. i have all kind of them now. subject varies but the crux of the matter is nothing but the timepass. i have all the time in the world and i have repeated this sentence like a parrot for 100th time in my last few posts. but what can i do? i even have downloaded a book titled 'how to get a decent job' and other one titled 'how to face interviews'. i dont think that this kind of books are going to help me anyway because i dont face the interviews the way they think one should face. i have sensed certain kind of anxiety in the eyes of my interviewers. they might have thought how strange my answers are and how different. i always experiment a lot so my interviews are always full of fun and comedies, though there are seldom chances of me getting the job. anyway i dont much care about what happens and what not. but someday i will be able to face interviews with out embracing my interviewer.

it is beautiful sunday morning and birds are still sleeping. i also want to go to sleep after i put few more downloads in the queue. i have even downloaded few discourses of OSHO in hindi. they are very old and rare. may be those discourses were given in the mid and late 1970s. how interesting this discourses are? i can not tell you that until i listen to them all and it is going to take some time as i am not in any kind of hurry. it is really very dark outside and it also is raining a bit so i can not go out early in the morning and can not enjoy my regular sessons of cycling+smoking in the morning. i am also very tired and dont want to go out and drain my self. i am also very hungry now and i have to go downstairs to have some snacks.

i still remember the incident exactly as it happened. under some kind of hypnotic infulence i talked with the man who was under the infulence of alcohol. he was like alcohol content 120% guy. yes i am talking about P.D. Mathew. the moochad mannu kaka came to me and told me that this guy was lying near the jackie's lari on the corner of the bridge. mannu kaka, johnty and i inquired a lot and he told me that his daughter is incometax officer and his father is Deputy General of Police, Gujarat State. he was on a 1857 model priya scooter with three gears and was dressed like a railway station bum. manhush kaka offer him a bidi and he said okey. i also enjoyed manukaka's bidi. the guy was talking about beaut of kerala after rains (hallucinations). i tried him to help and understand that he is not in kerala and is in baroda, but the exactly opposite happened. you can not argue with the drunkards and think that you are going to win the arguement. he talked about so many things that i am going to write a book on his teachings. the teachings of Dr. (Dr. is for Dr.unkard) P.D. Mathew. by Saboo Psycho. i will get publishers very soon as i am writing a lot. and even if i dont get one i will publish the whole lot on the blogger and you have to be patient to read all the crap i post regularly. i am going to post the fifth issue of lazicopedia's first volume and it would be the last issue in the volume I. from next month i will again start researching on laziness content available online and will begin second volume. till then bye bye.

long live laziness long live brotherhood.

Local Trains.

yaah i am here in amdavad again within a month. it is saturday and i am here for two days. monday evening i again will be back in baroda. i hope that there will not be any rains so i can go out of my house. why i am here in amdavad. for nothing. everyone in my family is sick this days. half of them are on bed-rest and half of them need rest badly.

i and nikhil came to amdavad today morning. it was a beautiful journey from baroda to amdavad. plains between anand and nadiad are now darker than the national flag of pakistan. green is the color of the season now. MEMUs are life line of those who travel through it everyday and i really enjoy my journeys on this most crowded local trains of gujarat. i will write about my experiences in the train today at length, but not right now. i am having all kind of problems with this pc at my home. every few seconds some error occurs and i dont know what to do about it. i dont have anyother choice now so i have to use this computer.

will tell you about the things that happened today and yesterday and how i killed more time with my friends, books, and a psycho serial middle-aged lady killer. i also should tell you people a story untold about a friend of mine. he is really great. i call him my knight. he is a gone-case. and may be that is why i attract him the most. but anyway i will have to part ways with this psycho as soon as possible and should start living with harmony again. baba only knows whom i am talking about and pathetic friends also can guess if they try to remember old things that happened in phursatgunj few months back. anyway will be back soon after some time, till then good bye.

long live laziness. long live brotherhood.

September 08, 2006

Reading and 'Self' distruction

i am back again with the salt and spice of phursatgunj. 'self' distruction is my passion and few packs of foursquare a day helps me to attain the goal. phursatgunj is full of people who believe in self distruction some or the other way, and kalubhai is the greatest of them all. it seems as if rain will never stop this season. i was busy reading the holy quran in the morning when nikhil told me to lit a cigi. now i read all kind of ebooks as i dont have money to buy hardcopies. i am reading a few of them alltogether. eleven minutes by paulo is a good one. umesh has a hardcopy of that book and i will try to get the one as soon as possible. i am also reading zeher by paulo. thought my understanding is not very profound but i have all the time in the world to kill time so i read. it also helps me to save money. whenever i move outside my sardarnagar kholi i have to smoke and T, so i prefer to stay inside and read all kind of ebooks. subject doesnt matter much as long as it helps me to kill time. in last few years during my stay in phursatgunj i have read more than 2000 books and still going on strongly. thank god that i dont have a good memory otherwise i would have gone mad just by reading all those books. my understanding is also very poor so i have to read the same line again and again, and it also helps me to kill time again and again. now i have developed a new style of reading, very unique. now i read one page from a book and than one from another and the cycle goes on and on untill i come back to the first book which i have started reading. this method helps me to understand how all books and scriptures in the world is nothing but rubbish. i started doing this with 3 or 4 books at a time but now i read atleast 10 books simultaneously. someday i will stop reading and than will never read or write anything my whole life and i know that is going to happen. sooner or later. my passion for reading is also a part of the bigger and yet important goal of self distruction. when i was a child i had a dream that someday i will be able to read all the books in the world written and spoken about. but now i think it is nothing but all timepass to read and write and i am not very much interested in either. i stroke this keys on the keyboard mindlessly because i dont have anything to do and have all time in the world. reading is divine as far as you dont do it to gain knowledge or try to understand what is written. what is written is written and it is past now, just dont try to interpret and you are creative.

today i shall try to visit our osho meditation centre at karelibaug. dynamic meditation is designed for young and energetic but i will try to imitate 60 year old youth of baroda. they come to centre because they dont have to do anything in the morning and i go to the centre because after dynamic meditation i can enjoy free tea and a good long sleep at sardarnagar kholi. few people in phursatgunj is now interested in dynamic meditation and want to go to the centre with me, few initial shocks will be enough for them to quit even before they begin. i dont care. they come or they dont. now i have to go back to sardarnagar kholi. i have to finish the first chapter of the holy quran, al bakaraah - the cow before i go into bed. will be back soon.

long live laziness. long live brotherhood.

September 07, 2006

again and again and again

now i am back and it is raining outside so i can not move out of this cafe. i dont know when this rain will stop. it is raining as if god thinks that we are thrusty for last 1000000000 years. i is almost 6 30 and i have to go to sardarnagar now as i dont have money to stay here at this very costly cybercafe. 10rs/hour is like 10million/hour for me these days. lately i was interviwed by a callcentre cookoo and he wanted me to join his warehouse call centre at gorva GIDC as soon as possible but i think he is not willing to pay us as we demanded and so i droped the idea to work there. umesh also is not interested in that bhootiya call centre. but i have to find some work as soon as possible today someone mailed me to inquire about my interests in content writing and i just replied that mail. i think i will get the job as the guy who mailed me is very positive about my skills. i dont know i have any but he thinks i will be able to work and satisfy his needs. all i can do is to wait and watch for his reply.

what is happening at phursatgunj? so many things and so little time now to tell you people about the latest ventures of kalubhai. i even have to tell you about the great drunkard Mr. P.D. Mathew. but as i have to make a move right now i will tell you people about the things some other time. today i bought a newpaper after such a long time that i will read it word to word as i dont have anything to do for the whole day today. ranjit singh is also interested now to blog his stories. i have invited him to our lazy blog again and again i have to wait for months untill again he will tell me to invite him again. now again i feel like pee so i have to move now. good day my fellow brothers of laziness. see you soon with latest phursatgunj stories.

long live laziness. long live brotherhood.

War and Peace

so, i have a new neighbour and he is a psycho. this story is full of spices. my encounters with a psycho. i imagine when my landlord masi will get some decent tenants?

he is like a sheep, a village idiot. he works with the fortune infotech where umesh used to work. he is from some remote village of north gujarat and very religious in the ways of the world, so masi naturally loves him a lot. he is her favourite because he always pays his rent on time and never mess with anyone except me. but i think he won't be able to resist the thrust enforced by his greatest enemy ever - saboo. one should choose enemies with care.

before a month or so our war began, and for one month he fought like a Medieval soldier. i know he is not an ordinary soul as he resisted my madness for one full month. but he is tired now. he tried to retaliate but he can neither match my patience nor my power. finally he retreated yesterday and now is planning to move to some other place. but he is not welcome anywhere so he is more fustrated now and looks at me as if he will kill me the very moment. but he knows that he is not that lucky. umesh told me that no one talks to him at fortune and he rarely talks. he has no friends in phursatgunj and he never comes out of his 10 by 12 room. he is homesick and has all kind of psychological problems. he also fights with other tenants at masi's place. they are a bunch of kids doing their MBA and not very much interested in his shoutings. he is a real fool. his colleagues dont want to share their space with him and now as he is not getting abode of his choice he is really very very very fustrated. no body loves him in the whole city of baroda. whenever opportunity is there he never misses to quarrel with paperwallah, sardarnagar shopkeepers and even masi's neighbours. noise between 0.005 and 0.0005 db errupts volcano in his brain and i enjoy hard rock very much when i am depressed. and you people know that i am going through the great depression so i unload my self with the noise like music or music like noise. (anything works.) he pays rent for the bathroom and not for his 12 by 10 kholi. you can always find him in bathroom. sometimes for 4 hours at a stretch. he always chant hari om hari om so loudly that loudspeakers are no match. he thinks that just by chanting hari om mindlessly and taking bath 24 times a day will purify him. i doubt his frequent visits to bathroom. my new room partner nikhil thinks that he masturbates 10 times a day. god only knows but i think may be he is right. i am not interested in his bathroom adventures but afterall we share the bathroom so i have to pee there and can not go out just to pee. so i bolt the bathroom from outside, no options you know. all this started before a month when first time he told me not to smoke infront of his room. as we share the common space infront of my room i never took it seriously. he was very angry and began the month long war which he ultimately lost. now he has no options but to surrender of retreat and man of his stature can not surrender so he has to retreat now. i dont like he way he lost the war but he has to as his choice of enemy was wrong. now i have to go out and smoke a cigi so will be back and will tell you about other things that happened here in phursatgunj and also about my latest encounters at a call center.

will be back soon, just 10 mins.

September 04, 2006

In search of P.D. Ouspensky, and P.D. Mathew.

for last 2 hours i am search this e-book on the internet: in search of miraculous by P.D. Ouspensky.

our search began at 6 pm in the morning. i met bodhisamarpan baba at kalubhai's lari and we were talking about the books osho loved. he told me about a book by the disciple of Dr. G.I. Gurdjieff, P.D. Ouspensky. The book In search of miraculous is a rare one. we went to station book stalls and talked to our sindhi booksellers if they can arrange one for us. they agreed to help us but i think it is not going to work as we have only 1 copy of that book available in india and that too inside the personal library of osho at pune ashram which is not accessable. than i decided to go to railway station and asked the bookseller there that if he can help us out and what he said was very shocking: hai.. aa hu hoi sa? kai chopadi ni vato karo so. he is mad. than we decided to go to cross word tomorrow and search for the book. but i think we wont find one there as in gujarat only 10 people are interested in what GI an PD said and why they said what they said. than i decided to go to internet cafe in the afternoon and i am here. i have searched a lot with no result. google says there are zillions of results but i think not even one is useful to us. somehow through internet communities i will be able to arrange it if possible. afterall osho loved that book.

so now in search of miraculous has ignited a new search: in search of P.D. Ouspensky. this is my new timepass now. i will search it like a madman, like a whirlwind i will roam around the baroda and will try to find one copy. from this bookstore to that bookstore and this internet access point to that internet access point.

phursatgunj is a beautiful place, nothing changes here. i have watched that movie forest gump 16 times in last one month. nothing new is happening here and i am very lazy to even observe changes. for me it is same as it was before 5 years and will be same after 5 years. pehalwan again forgot the url, for him i have to paste it again here. www.blogger.com. and your id is lazyguru but i dont know anything about your password and you have to find it yourself. it also will be a good timepass for you tomorrow. in search of password by Lazyguru. it could be a bestseller if you take pain to punch few keys on your lazy computer's not so user friendly keyboard. i dont know what ranjitsingh is doing these days but as he says, no news is good news.
most of the time i imagine why we all lazy people are so lazy but i think that is the way of life. yes laziness is the way of life. today a drunkard enlighten me, asusual. i will talk about him later. his name was P.D. Methew. he can be in baroda and kerala at the same time. he is an illetrate intellectual. that is a big story and will tell you people about it later. he is funny as hell, amazing. as osho says, i love drunkards, they say such great things and no newspaper takes any notes. his life is full of tragedy and he made it a super hillarious comedy. for him self distruction is the way of life. i dont think i will be able to meet him again in this life but that one hour conversation was really juicy. i will miss him for the great things that he preached. our great moochad mannukaka was also very much impressed. will tell you the full story in my next blog as it can take upto 3 hours of typing and i already have typed enough today.

as promised i shall tell you people about the great forest gump. forest gump is a mentally challenged boy. he is weak in the ways of the world. but his ability to do things mindlessly and singlemindely is amazing. bodhisamarpan baba also loved that movie. the way he runs mindlessly for 3 years is amazing. there is no particular reason behind anything he does. he follow his heart. he never looks back. as his mom says you have to leave your past behind and have to walk on and on. he joins army, plays ping-pong, became a national celebrity, a sailor, a millionaire and much more i dont remember. his childhood girlfriend is also amazing. as his mom says: life is a box of chocolates, you never know what you will get inside. sweet or bitter. movie is beyond explanations and you have to watch it to understand. highly spiritual hidden meaning behind the movie. 5 stars out of 5 stars. a must watch. watch it if you can arrange.

today was a good day so many great things happened at i am very happy early in the morning. it is still dark outside and mosquitoes enjoyed my cold blood very much. now i have to make a move as i am in no mood to bore you people with another edition of lazicopedia today. today i have to go to the technology faculty to listen to fools talking part in an annual exercise of debate - the paramarash, as they say. how shallow their knowledge is and they shout like as they are selling pav-bhaji at baroda railway station. anyway i am not concerned and i go there just to kill time and enjoy foolish talks. subjects varies from ragging to world peace. we also have elections here in the university so it is really funny to go there and watch fools shouting, vote for idiot, vote for joker. but i dont care as it is a good timepass for me. in the evening i also have to go to gidc for that call centre job in which our employers are very much interested and i and umesh are not. shall tell you about great P.D. Mathew tomorrow till than good bye. great day.

long live laziness, long live brotherhood.