I was pretty tense on Sunday night as I had to wake up at 4:00 a.m. in the morning to catch the 6:45 flight to Chennai. I barely managed to sleep for few hours and the alarm rang. Unwillingly, I got ready and reached to the Bangalore airport at around 5:45. There was a long queue for security check. It seemed as if the whole Bangalore was going somewhere. The scenes at airport were no different from a small town bus station. Air Deccan employees were shouting for passengers like private bus operators.
My flight was on time. As the plane went up in the sky, I saw an ocean of clouds outside my window. It was a breathtaking sight. We landed in Chennai at 7:45 in the morning. The climate was damp. I hired a pre-paid taxi and asked for the U.S. consulate office. The traffic was moving smoothly. I was busy gathering my first impressions of the city. From the window of my cab, Chennai looked much cleaner than Mumbai. Also less crowded. There were no Hindi signboards except for some government buildings. It seemed to me that the city lacked Mumbai’s frantic pace and energy.
As soon as I reached to the U.S. consulate office, I saw a huge gathering of anxious people. A few minutes of close inspection revealed that they were friends or relatives of the visa applicants. Just outside the entrance of the consulate office, some 90 odd candidates were waiting in the queue. After cursing my luck for about half an hour, I decided to join the queue. Soon, I found out that only those people whose interviews are scheduled 15-30 minutes later need to stand in the queue. My interview was at 1:30 in the afternoon and I had almost three and a half hours left. I started searching for an internet café. But, there was none in sight. Then I saw Café Coffey Day. I went inside and ordered one tea and veg puff. I wanted to spend as much time as possible. But, after an hour I got tired and again went back to the consulate office.
At around 12:00 in the afternoon I joined the queue again. The Chennai heat was merciless. I was also feeling extremely sleepy. My agony lasted for two and a half hours. By the time, I was asked to go inside, I was exhausted.
As soon as I entered the office, I saw people standing in queues in front of 5-6 windows. After few minutes, I was also asked to join one of the queues. In those windows, I think our desi people were screening the documents of candidates. Once that is done, I was asked to go to the adjacent building were Americans were taking interviews.
There was utter chaos. I couldn’t figure out anything. I was asked to go for finger scanning. Once I did that, I was told to go for the interview. The interview windows were just like inquiry counters at railway stations. I stood behind an old couple who wanted to go to U.S. to meet their son/daughter. The interviewer was a funny looking guy with a pony tail. Once he was done with the old couple, he looked up and made some funny expression. I started laughing. It was the funniest interview of my life. Both of us were laughing during the entire interview. Here are some of the excerpts:
Interviewer: “Which kind of food do you like?”
Answer: “Gujarati thali.”
Interviewer: “Do you believe in Santa Claus?”
Answer: “Yes.”
Interviewer: “Have you applied for the visa before (checking something in his computer)?
Answer: “No.”
Interviewer: “Have you gone to our Mumbai office?
Answer: “No.”
Interviewer: “Do you have a twin?”
Answer: “No.”
He also asked me what my job is and why I want to go to U.S. He became very happy to know that I am a journalist and said that he loves journalists. Finally, after congratulating me, he said, “This is going to be real fun.” Don’t know what he meant by that? Is it going to be a real fun for me or for Americans? Nevertheless, I thanked him and came out of the visa office. I immediately hired an auto and reached to Chennai airport to catch the flight back to Bangalore.
During my entire Chennai visit I spoke only few words outside the consulate office. They were: pre-paid taxi, U.S. consulate office, tea, Wills, veg puff and airport.
My flight was on time. As the plane went up in the sky, I saw an ocean of clouds outside my window. It was a breathtaking sight. We landed in Chennai at 7:45 in the morning. The climate was damp. I hired a pre-paid taxi and asked for the U.S. consulate office. The traffic was moving smoothly. I was busy gathering my first impressions of the city. From the window of my cab, Chennai looked much cleaner than Mumbai. Also less crowded. There were no Hindi signboards except for some government buildings. It seemed to me that the city lacked Mumbai’s frantic pace and energy.
As soon as I reached to the U.S. consulate office, I saw a huge gathering of anxious people. A few minutes of close inspection revealed that they were friends or relatives of the visa applicants. Just outside the entrance of the consulate office, some 90 odd candidates were waiting in the queue. After cursing my luck for about half an hour, I decided to join the queue. Soon, I found out that only those people whose interviews are scheduled 15-30 minutes later need to stand in the queue. My interview was at 1:30 in the afternoon and I had almost three and a half hours left. I started searching for an internet café. But, there was none in sight. Then I saw Café Coffey Day. I went inside and ordered one tea and veg puff. I wanted to spend as much time as possible. But, after an hour I got tired and again went back to the consulate office.
At around 12:00 in the afternoon I joined the queue again. The Chennai heat was merciless. I was also feeling extremely sleepy. My agony lasted for two and a half hours. By the time, I was asked to go inside, I was exhausted.
As soon as I entered the office, I saw people standing in queues in front of 5-6 windows. After few minutes, I was also asked to join one of the queues. In those windows, I think our desi people were screening the documents of candidates. Once that is done, I was asked to go to the adjacent building were Americans were taking interviews.
There was utter chaos. I couldn’t figure out anything. I was asked to go for finger scanning. Once I did that, I was told to go for the interview. The interview windows were just like inquiry counters at railway stations. I stood behind an old couple who wanted to go to U.S. to meet their son/daughter. The interviewer was a funny looking guy with a pony tail. Once he was done with the old couple, he looked up and made some funny expression. I started laughing. It was the funniest interview of my life. Both of us were laughing during the entire interview. Here are some of the excerpts:
Interviewer: “Which kind of food do you like?”
Answer: “Gujarati thali.”
Interviewer: “Do you believe in Santa Claus?”
Answer: “Yes.”
Interviewer: “Have you applied for the visa before (checking something in his computer)?
Answer: “No.”
Interviewer: “Have you gone to our Mumbai office?
Answer: “No.”
Interviewer: “Do you have a twin?”
Answer: “No.”
He also asked me what my job is and why I want to go to U.S. He became very happy to know that I am a journalist and said that he loves journalists. Finally, after congratulating me, he said, “This is going to be real fun.” Don’t know what he meant by that? Is it going to be a real fun for me or for Americans? Nevertheless, I thanked him and came out of the visa office. I immediately hired an auto and reached to Chennai airport to catch the flight back to Bangalore.
During my entire Chennai visit I spoke only few words outside the consulate office. They were: pre-paid taxi, U.S. consulate office, tea, Wills, veg puff and airport.
Inscrutable Americans. this is going to be a real joyride for you and for americans too.
ReplyDeleteYes, they have given me the visa.
ReplyDeleteThis is my longest post till date.
ReplyDeletelegal or illegal all kind of unnatural sex should be avoided. your chennai experiences are really funny, baba. hai lazyguru, how is our Dr. saheb?
ReplyDeleteI am fine 20box Dr. saheb is also well. Today there was some mini-riots in Mumbai by the supporters of Dr. Ambedkar Saheb . I am still in the office and will return late, I hope I would be spared as I am friend of Dr. saheb.
ReplyDeleteha ha, Dr. Saheb must be very busy today. There should be no violence when you accept Buddhism as your religion.
ReplyDeleteViolent Buddhism.
ReplyDeleteMehul, congratulaions first.
ReplyDeleteI invite you all as to how you would have answered the queries by the visa officer. Anando- No offense intended.
Which kind of food you like?
We are more interested in drinks than food.sir.
Do you believe in Santa Claus?
No. I believe in Santa Singh. Also his brother Banta Singh.
Have you applied for visa before?
(scratching your neck)god forbid.
Have you gone to our Mumbai office?
I came reluctantly to your chennai office. Had it been Mumbai, I would not have.
Do you have twin?
NO. We are quadruplets. Sabu, Gaurav, Myself and a new born Ranjit.
"Is it going to be a real fun for me or for Americans?"
ReplyDeleteROFL...